It's the summer of 2010 and the temperatures have soared to the hottest days that we have seen in a long time. It will definitely not be a summer to forget! Due to the current situation of sweltering heat, citizens have swarmed to cooler areas, the beach. The over-populated beaches have lead to overcrowding, too much noise, and unpleasing sights.
The Michigan beaches are loaded with a bunch of noisy quacks :) When the daily temperatures start to rise about the eighties, and sometimes even the seventies, people tend to haul out their bathing suits and jump in their wagons to the squeaky sand on Lake Michigan. Car trunks are filled with floatation devices and noodles, coolers are filled with pop, chips, and fruit, and umbrellas are tucked neatly between a set of lawn chairs. Before even thinking of laying down the prized, beach possessions, the owners cannot forget the brightly colored towels that either have an intricate pattern to describe their personality or some super-cool cartoon character's face smack in the middle of the course fabric. Going to the beach is just a simple, day's work.
On top of all the neat accessories that accompany the beach, there are also a variety of people. On a hot day at the beach you will see a pack of muscular (boys) men run around in their Hawaiian style trunks, sweaty from running around playing volleyball. If they don't kick sand in your face as they run or if they don't hit you with their ball, then they can be quite interesting eye candy. At the same time the "man group" comes to the beach you encounter many young, teenaged girls, laying in their itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow, polka-dotted bikinis. They turn more and more crispy, like rotisserie chicken, as the sun climbs to its hottest temperature. The young girls may not say anything, but the attire definitely suggests feelings of competitiveness between all women. Who looks best in a bathing suit? The world may never know.
Sure, there are the teenagers that run amuck throughout the sand, but one must not forget all of the families, with little kids. There is always the naked toddler running in and out of the water, and another child stuck in a diaper-- good thing there's a poop catcher because I wouldn't want any poop or pee falling into the lake.... Parents are constantly yelling for their kids. Worries about undertows and pedophiles take over the minds of parents who came to the beach to "relax." Sometimes, there is the occasional parent who decides to sleep in the sand or read a good book under their umbrella, but most of them are watching out for their annoying children.
The young infants and toddles have no game against the elementary and middle-school aged children. A common problem for beach is the screaming. Even on the hottest days of the year the Lake water is still ice-cold. Each new child that enters the water has to scream and remind the beach-goers that the water is, indeed, still cold. Then a feisty older brother starts to pick on his poor, little sister, and more screaming ensures. The planned quiet day at the beach turns into a carnival of crazies.
Among all of the families and smokin' babes are all of the average-Joes. This group contains all of the chubby, old men with dark, curly hairs running down their stomachs, the women of the Red Hat Society, and the group of tourist eager to see the fresh water and feel the unique sand. These people don't really contribute to anything... except for the noise and other eyesores. Occasionally, there are the runners, the treasure hunters, and the college students. The runners work extra-hard against the sand and the treasure hunters hoping to make it big while the college-aged girls jump in the air trying to get a cool silhouette combining the elements of the sun and water. These select people are not worthy to be named beach dwellers. Nonetheless, the still contribute to the beach quacks and noises.
So, after examining the array of colors, listening to the obnoxious noises, feeling the freezing water and scorching sand, and seeing all of the people on the beach, I have realized that the beach is a crazy concept. Nowhere else do people actually come together and sit, partially naked, absorb the sun until it hurts, and be uncomfortable with sand riding up to you-know-where. We insist of jumping in a lake that could cause frostbit or hypothermia-- maybe not to that extent, but lips and toes may turn blue! We put ourselves in a position of drowning and other dangerous, and extremely vulnerable, places. There are strong undertows and a risk of someone going missing. I wouldn't necessarily call this a fun, family day.
For some reason, I am drawn to this so-called beach. I love the smiles that I see on the faces around me, and I especially enjoy seeing families together. The beach brings a sense of community. I love the feeling of carrying my over sized floaties, my striped towel, and an attitude ready to have fun. It's always fun to burn the bottom of my feet and I run towards to slapping waves of the water. Normally, I stay too long and end up with red skin. My cheeks turn rosy and my hair dry and tangled from the thrashing it received in the water. Sure, there are many things to worry about... but don't we worry too much from day to day? Enjoy the sun!
<3 your beach-bum
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